And this, my friends, is where they went wrong. Because the monkeys are not on the planes. They are inspecting baggage going onto the planes, in the employ of Homeland Security Theater. So, with the new, stricter baggage regulation policies now in effect to make you feel safer (whether or not you actually are), a few rules for dealing with them:
- If you are packing liquid soap, in checked baggage because it won't show up on carry-on, expect them to uncork the dispenser, take out a bit to check what it is, and then leave the plunger free to move when they put it back in the bag, so that subsequent baggage handling will push out more soap. Mmmmm... soapy chocolate.
- If you pack any device that they have not seen before, they will tear it apart trying to figure out what it is, even if it is plastic, an X-ray reveals no metal components, and there is plainly no room for an explosive charge big enough to wake a sleeping gerbil. They will then haphazardly shove the components back into the baggage. Maybe you can figure out how to put it back together (or how to make a working device from the subset of pieces you have left!)
citizens consumers, it's for your protection! Be grateful!